Friday, 16 July 2010

Relief of a Silly Bugger

It's been a very long week.  The last seven days have been somewhat of a strain as I have worried myself sick over my health.  What's she going on about now? I hear you ask.  Something I've been wanting to share with you for some time but have been unable to find the right words to make it sound, how can I say this, a walk in the park.  As you know, I've been having a few issues with my epilepsy recently, issues that have stripped me of my driving licence and a lot of my independence, not to mention the happy go lucky attitude I have always enjoyed.  Being unable to wait for the NHS to make up its mind about giving me an appointment, I decided to throw caution (and money) to the wind and go private.  How glad I am that I did.  Last Friday was my initial appointment with the consultant, a lovely man, knowledgeable and helpful, determined to get to the bottom of my sudden seizures.  I was booked in for an MRI head scan and an ECG, all within a matter of days.  I have hardly slept all week, lost my appetite (probably not a bad thing) and worried that my results would result in something far more sinister than I could possible cope with.

The lovely nurse at the hospital where I had the MRI scan removed the cage-like contraption first when I told her how incredibly claustrophobic I am.  It was just like lying in a tunnel with a few very loud noises to keep me company.  It didn't hurt and wasn't half as bad as I imagined, having kept myself up most of the previous night with worry. The only part of it that was uncomfortable however, was the gown I had to wear with only a pair of knickers underneath, and I hadn't shaved my legs. The ECG made me think of the electric chair, without the priest.  My hair was gooey afterwards but another lovely nurse comforted me and made me realise that having tests wasn't so bad after all.  But then, on Friday afternoon, came the results.

I wasn't sure I could get through the morning without at least a prayer or two; and I didn't.  I've never prayed so much in all my life.  The picture of Amy on the fireplace kept me strong; I asked that I be spared in order to look after my girl and see her grow into the beautiful young woman I imagine.  The consultant called me into his office, his hand shake and smile telling me very little in my uncertainty.  The Farmer and I sat next to each other, opposite the consultant, watching as he went over his notes and recollected our meeting the previous Friday.  "So, the results," he began, as I clenched my hands, perhaps an obvious horror telling in my eyes.  "The MRI was absolutely normal," he said, as he looked at me and smiled, watching my tears stream with relief.  "The ECG shows an impressive photo sensitive epilepsy but we knew that already.  I am changing your medication because the one you are currently on isn't the correct one for this type of epilepsy."  He went on to talk about it being heightened at those crappy hormonal times, you know, the ones where we ladies call, 'time of the month' and told me that I could be sensitive to the computer and it might be an idea to wear dark glasses when using it.  So here I am, sat looking at you with my sunglasses on.  Probably looking like a complete prat, but who cares?  At least I'm still here.


47 comments:

  1. That's brilliant news, i'm so pleased for you. Sometimes it definitely is worth paying :) x

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  2. Gosh what a relief!! I'm not normally one for praying but in situations like this it's gotta be worth a try!!!

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  3. Fantastic news.

    You're not the only one to use sunglasses for the computer, I had to do so last year too (and with one lens blocked out). So we could look like prats together if my eyes go again!
    Cx

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  4. Ahhhh well GOOD!! This is a Good thing! Put your sunglasses on and keep them there little girl! Stop peeking!Hahaaa...
    Sorry that you went through all that hell!!
    ((((HUG))))

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  5. Wonderful news! Progress, moving ahead, all that good stuff. And the stories you will be able to tell from behind your new eyeware, and about it.

    Many blessings in this phase of the adventure.

    And don't worry about the dark glasses. We have a Member of Parliament here in Canada who has some health issues, and wears large dark glasses everywhere, including when she's sitting in the House of Commons. You and she are making "cutting edge" medical statements. (Or something like that.)

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  6. What problems may be solved by a pair of glasses! Happy to hear that's better.

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  7. Oh joy, so glad everything is okay! Have you ever looked at natural remedies to epilepsy, I look at a few for you...
    go here.. http://www.mamaherb.com/epilepsy

    beetroot, cucumber, grape juice... give it a try hun and I hope you feel better.

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  8. WHO CARES about sunglasses?! Whatever you have to do, my dear, whatever you have to do. The point is that you ARE still here with us, and for that we - I know I am - are thanking God! :)

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  9. Happy Dance and a Hug for you!!!!!
    You are just so wonderful you need to wear shades while on the computer.
    Dress it up you trend setter. I look forward to you posting a photo wearing your "happy and oh so relieved to just need shades". Hint... there should be a smile :)
    In fact if you'd like to e-mail me I'd love to send you a novel pair.
    Pun intended. You can don whichever shade suits your mood! I bet others might enjoy doing so too. How about it?

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  10. I am also reading that maassage works quite well to alleviate symptoms, vit B-6, gourd juice, etc.
    http://natural-health.most-effective-solution.com/2009/04/natural-remedies-for-epilepsy/

    you would be amazed at how much our diets play into our problems! I have Crohns and the food I eat directly impacts when I get a flair up, I hope this helps

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  11. I am so pleased for you CJ that it was just a matter of changing your medication. How awful these last few days must have been, so worrying. I felt quite emotional for you. But great news! Hugs. A x

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  12. What a relief for you. And good for you for seizing the bull by the horns... that's true bravery. Glad it's been rewarded. What a pity the ol' NHS can't be more like that eh?

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  13. What a relief for you, this good news. I am so pleased.

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  14. Hooray!!! So happy for the good news and the news of your corrected medication. The waiting is the worst, isn't it. Hope you feel better soon. You can pretend to be Bono with the shades on ;-)

    Janet xox

    Hello to Amy!

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  15. Fantastic news! yes definately worth the money,,,it is the waiting which is the hardest! A private consultation is worth every penny cos you get an appointment in a reasonable time span, not light years away!

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  16. Oh and hey baby shades are cool! Rock on! (Does that sound old?) lol!

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  17. Good news, it must be reasssuring to have such a thorough assessment. And lol at the thought of you there with your sunglasses on!

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  18. hiya CJ, I have just popped round to yours to see how you are, and wow, what a time of it you had! So glad to hear things are on the up! I am so pleased for you. and don't forget you are now offically the coolest blogger ever with your shades on! ((hugs!!))

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  19. Glad to hear the good news - what about one of those green screen visor things for the pc - better look than sunglasses

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  20. I am also photo sensitive to light and have to be very careful in bright lights of all kinds, otherwise I get a migraine, which can last up to four days all together.
    Although I am sorry for your illness, at least they know what it is and can offer some helpful suggestions. One day you won't have your womanly problems monthly and perhaps then you will start to heal. A lot can be blamed on hormones and I am proof of it. I was up to about 3 migraines a week at one time, just before the menopause and now, I don't have them for months, which is infinitely better. I have done nothing different in my life except that the hormones have settled down at last.
    Good luck with your recovery. Let's hope you can soon get to grips with it.
    Blessings, Star

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  21. Thank goodness for such good news. Being in the "waiting room" of uncertain news is unsettling to say the least!

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  22. Jumps in the air flapping hands! Excellent news xx

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  23. You lot are the best! I am having to dry the eyes again, your comments have really touched me.

    I'll sort out that photo of me with these shades on and you can make up your own minds!!

    Thank you, all. CJ xx

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  24. Hey, that sounds great! What a relief - and I hope it works!

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  25. Wonderful news! .... and life goes on...

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  26. I'm very happy for you, CJ. I hope the new medicine works well and that the sunglasses do their job. Good luck to you.

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  27. OH CJ what a relief. I wish we have the money so that I could go private and stop all the worrying. I too can not sleep due to the anxiety. I am so pleased that it is treatable, but also bloody pissed off that you had to pay too!

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  28. That is fab news!!! bet you look like a rock star with the shades. Money very well spent XXX

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  29. Oh gosh! Part of me says ' You poor thing1' because I feel for the agony you have been going through ... and the rest of me says 'Yippeee!'Thank goodness the news was not the bad news you feared.I think you will look very glam and you made me smile with your description of yourself. Take care hun. Sarah

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  30. So happy for your good news! Thankful you were able to see a new doctor for new meds for ideas on how to work with the situation. I pray that the new medicine is the answer. The sunglasses? hehe what was that 80's song? I wear my sunglasses at night . . .?

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  31. I am so pleased that everything turned out ok. You must have been on a rollercoster this week.

    Its such a shame when the NHS let you down - but I think you did the right thing.

    Lets hope you can go forward now and at least not have the worries you have had in the last few weeks.

    Lots of hugs to you.

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  32. Great news!
    Delighted for you, had been wondering about your appointment.
    And I'm glad that you invested in yourself, it was well worth it.
    Happy days!

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  33. So pleased for you. I love the thought of sunglasses for computer use! You could start a new trend. :D

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  34. That's great news for you. How wonderful it is when we don't have to worry anymore.

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  35. I'm so glad that you're ok and can manage with new meds.I'm sure you will get used to the glasses very quickly! :)

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  36. You know, I had no idea that you hadn't had more sinister causes of seizures ruled out. I'm so sorry and can only imagine the burden of this on your heart and mind. Thank God for small miracles. I'm so happy you're finally getting the proper treatment.


    Don't go hating your hormones--you'll miss them soon enough. Find a way to deal with their less than pleasant symptoms.

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  37. Hi there, I've visited your Blog before and somehow am only getting back to it now.

    That's fantastic news for you and your family. Our worst nightmare to think we'd leave this earth when there's so much to do for our kids.

    You should treat yourself to a pair of the coolest shades ever! x Jazzy

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  38. Thrilled with your news. I hope you will be driving again soon. Surely the year is almost up now?
    Maggie X

    Nuts in May

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  39. Glad you got such good news. Does this mean you can drive again?

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  40. brilliant news and glad you got a quick result xxxx

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  41. Blogging in shades? Sounds pretty cool and a little enigmatic to me. Watch out, you might start a trend! ;)

    Sending you lots of ((hugs)).

    xxx

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  42. I'm so pleased your prayers were answered and Amy still has a healthy mother to guide her as she grows.

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  43. Maggie/Addy - Unfortunately no, I can't drive until I've been free of seizures completely for a whole year. I can't say when that will be right now but I'm hoping and praying with all my heart that it's this time next year.

    Thank you for all your lovely kind thoughts, they mean more than you will ever know.

    CJ xx

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  44. What WONDERFUL NEWS!!! I'm so glad you went "private" too!! Congratulations and who gives a rats hind end about dark glasses??? They are COOL. My mom used to wear them @ night driving, that was a bit scary.. LOL

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  45. That is fabulous news! Sometimes you just need a better doctor! I know that for a fact!

    I hope the meds begin working for you soon!

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  46. cnoihocv22, vimax bottle

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